I’ve Never Been Mugged

I’ve never been mugged, but, believe it or not, I’d like to be. I know, I know. I must be crazy, right? That might be true, but hear me out. You see, I love New York City. I’m head-over-heels infatuated with the Big Apple. I travel there whenever I can, which is never often enough. I worked in Manhattan for about a year. Unfortunately, I was too distracted by what might happen. I was just a tad hypervigilant. Violence is known to erupt quite randomly, in big cities and small towns, striking wherever and whenever we least expect it. So if I could just get mugged, that’s one less thing I’d have to worry about. Then I could relax and take in the city. Besides, everyone has a great I got mugged story but me.